Thursday, September 27, 2018

Black Pain|Black Rage

"Can't come around

They gon' wanna bring you down

No one knows just what's inside
Doing dope and doing time
Why they messing with your mind
Black maybe..."

-Common, U Black Maybe

About a month ago on the BGFB FB Page and on the blog, I briefly discussed how stress kills us! We often forget how stress manifest into Black rage and Black pain which silenty kill us slowly and daily. Rage, pain, and trauma all coincide with being Native Black in America, dealing with constantly mistreatment, no upward mobility, unstable and unhealth environments and constant lying of everybody is fine. Being Native Black in America consist of a complicated and unhealed journey of involuntarily infliction of pain, abuse, use, and mistreatment from others who inflicted pain and rage upon us.  

Black people are empathic, probably too empathic and forgiving when we shouldn't be. We extend our grace and mercy too often while others don't reciprocate it back.  As Native Black Americans/Descendant of Chattel Slavery, we often put aside our issues and unfortunately take on the issues of folks who don't care about us or acknowledge our horrific history of mistreatment here on the very soil our ancestors build, bleed farm, and died on.    

When we are in a state of rage, sometimes we tend to project that onto other Native Blacks through respectability politics. You know the pound cake speech:
"You should straighten your hair if you want to be respected by White Folks." 
"You should code-switch and talk this way to be accepted by the masses."  "You should send your children to this school over there for better opportunities." 
"You should do this that and the third for acceptance."

Whose acceptance and at what cost?  How is that acceptance working out for those who are assimilating and conforming or perhaps trying to escape Blackness? 
It doesn't work for us because we are constantly in a state of internal rage because you are trying to achieve this unrealistic and sabotaging perfection which is non-existence. (https://www.vox.com/identities/2018/4/4/17189310/martin-luther-king-anniversary-race-inequality-racism

Internalizing our rage is killing us and have been killing us since the beginning of time. Please let it out and not let internalized rage slowly kill you. Releasing rage is unpacking years, unlearning unhealthy coping mechanisms such as self-abuse, self-loathing, and self-sabotaging behaviors. Unfortunately, we can't unlearn and unpack centuries of trauma from slavery, disenfranchisement, broken families, no wealth, and injustice. It is okay to be mad AF because to be Black in America you are already in a state of rage on a daily basis. Just don't stay angry, do something productive about such as advocating for Black Americans, providing healing work if you are a mental health professional, support Black organizations, institutions, schools, and non-profits, get involved with your local community politics and help your fellow family members and community members to progressive onward.  Do something productive with that rage instead of suppressing and internalizing it. Internalizing pain and rage develop incurable diseases.  Rage is depression (inward anger), passive-aggressive, saying you okay when you aren’t.  Please stop walking around with a fake smile but you are a ticking time bomb. These behaviors are damaging and detrimental to your holistic health.

Masking our Black Pain and Rage is a daily coping mechanism that is vaguely discussed because we don't want to play into the stereotype of being an Angry Black Woman or Man. How is it that every other human can unleash and unpack their hurt and pain but we must internalize it all for the sake of looking pristine, holding onto a career or fragile self-image?  When are we going to individually and collective heal our rage and pain?
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