Monday, December 3, 2018

#SelfCare: Unfriend, Unfollow, and Get Unstuck!

Now I am not for the braggadocious, "I am going to unfollow and unfriend folks on my page. If you are reading this, you are safe." <---------brown do="" don="" girl="" p="" please="" t="" this="" tribe="">
I can't stand when folks make this attention-seeking announcement as if people are going to write their wrongs, correct certain behaviors to not get that unfriend/unfollowed button push when it comes to their page. You don't need to make an announcement because at the end of the day: 1. No one cares, 2. You look foolish, and 3. We all need to unfriend/unfollow people healthily and maturely. *Just go ahead and unfriend folks, drink your water and keep it moving because it is not that serious.*
If you are unsure and stuck on who you should unfriend/unfollow, check out some tips below.
1. The Toxic/Abusive/Racist/Hatred/Any Suspicious Folks need to be unfriended immediately. They showed you their true colors often; you constantly want to engage in negative behavior such as arguing, losing your cool, or constantly wanting to educate an ignorant person and refuse to change their ways. Even close family members, colleagues, friends, associates, and etc., can and should be unfriended if such behaviors are exhibited.
2. The "I'm Living My Best Life/I Don't Catch Feelings, I Catch Flights, Folks"! Chile, just because you catch flights, you need to catch feelings because maybe you are numb and need to work on releasing and coping with some inner trauma. We all have feelings. These folks usually brag about every little detail of their lives and try to make their fellow "followers"/"friends" feel awful about their not so glitzy and glamorous life. If you ever feel small, less than, self-doubt, or downplay your life, please unfriend these folks and start reaffirming how amazing you are. We don't know how folks are attaining these "lifestyles," It is also social media, and you recreate and fabricate who you are and what you do. *Sorry Not Sorry* People lie every day, B!
3. The "Randoms" and Network Opportunist: These folks are hella random, mainly users and have no reciprocal intentions for your "networking" relationship. These folks usually have a mutual friend or met at a conference that you may speak at. They friend you but only hit you up when an opportunity is involved for them. They suck you dry, name drop your name to get opportunities without building a rapport with you, and only slide in the DM to benefit them. Go ahead and unfriend/unfollow them immediately because these kinds of folks leave you resentful and bitter because they are habitual line steppers and boundary-pushers.
4. The "Get Ghost because I didn't like what you said or did, former BFF/friend/ex-significant other": I have a major issue with immature cowards who go ghost when times get hard, a disagreement occurred, or you kept said individual accountable. This person is playing a dangerous holistic, wellness damaging game. They don't need any further access to you because they got ghosts on you, stopped talking to you in real life but constantly want to keep tabs on what you're doing. Nah, son, you don't need to see what I am doing because you are not worthy and mature enough to confront the unknown issue at hand. They got a ghost, and you constantly beat yourself up because you are trying to out what you said or did for them to go ghost. Please show them the door once all communication is exhausted and ceased. Ghosting is debilitating, damaging your self-esteem and psyche, especially when you tried to figure out and even reach out to the said individual who went ghost on you. Don't go ghost, have a conversation, and mutual release the relationship, if applicable. If you have been ghosted, you just need to release that person and move forward in your life. Protect yourself and flyness.
Self-Care for Brown Girls:
Heal Your Inner FLY Girl:

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