Three Things I've Learned While Escaping A Toxic Workplace

"It's my time to shine
Been down for much too long
I've gotta get mine" -Lil Kim ft Mona Lisa- Time to Shine

What a week! I have recently put my two weeks noticed and left my toxic workplace. It was not a difficult decision because the handwriting was on the wall, I was given an ultimatum and decided to choose to throw the peace sign in the air and transition to run my business full-time. I can no longer build someone else's empire and legacy while neglecting to do the same for me and my family. I also can no longer handle being the only person of color in the history of that agency or any other agency. I can no longer give my voice and power away to incompetent, insensitive and systematic bigotry and racism. I can longer be fed scraps when I know my worth. I can no longer water down my existence as a Black woman in an all-White place. I decided to choose my intellect, to educate and coach women of color who are co-existing in a workspace that isn't conducive to their holistic flyness.

I have learned some valuable lessons while turning in my two-week notice and attending the Center for Women and Enterprise, Business Leaders Conference.

My door of opportunity opened: I was invited to become a mentor during the speed mentoring segment of the conference on Friday evening. I was confident that I was going to share my expertise in helping others to get clear on jump-starting a new program, business, ebook or other services. I did not think that I would help women get clear on their purpose, get clear on writing a pre-existing ebook, get clear on helping others speak their truth, get clear on selling and marketing to their target clients on social media and help me serve my purpose.

I did doubt myself in the beginning because I actually said to myself, "No one is going to come to my table because of my business name: Brown Girl From Boston." I had to stop with the negative self-talk, let me feel the vibration inside and check that feeling and emotion. I said, "Andrea, you are great enough to mentor and coach women who require your expertise. If you weren't good enough, I am sure you would not have been selected to coach and mentor the best business leaders in New England." After that inner positive self-talk and self-acceptance of positive energy, I looked up and had a line at my table.

I am in the recovery of being a perfectionist. I always have to check with myself because I want to deliver the best knowledge I possibly can deliver in a clear, concise and authentic way. I have to make sure that the mask is completely off because I want to connect with people in a way that they can receive the message, process the message and apply it to their life. My mission isn't to mislead anyone nor force information on someone who isn't ready to receive my message or receive a message that isn't aligned with their life or business.

During the conference, I had a chance to meet wonderful women who are leaders in their own light. I also had a chance to participate in workshops such as networking, confidence, mentoring, and selling yourself. There is nothing wrong with adding and enhancing your skills in the toolbox. Brown Girl From Boston was interviewed by the CWE online network about my business and my "Start Your Savvy Startup" app that is currently being developed as I talked. I had a chance to shine and discuss my techy side in which only a handful of people understand and know about. My app will help women and men developed their start-up business from the comforts of their own home with tutorials, homework, and templates developed by me! In other words, I will save you time and energy because this app is going to help so many people start their businesses without going to YouTube University and being completely lost and oversaturated by overloads of information.

Mama, I made it! I will be on TV again! Yeah, son!

Anyways, back to being professional and dignified. I have learned a lot from the CWE Conference, but I wanted to share my top three lessons that I have learned with all you FLY beaus and girls. Are you ready? Let's get it!

1. Maybe you need to enroll in my Recovering Perfectionist course! You nor your business and products will never, ever, ever, ever be perfect! You are not perfect and life is not perfect! Move... Get out your way and launch your business, products, services, cakes, cookies, ebooks and etc. You can always refine your business and yourself as time evolves.  Oh, you want to make millions right now... How about serving the people, inspiring the people and the money will come. Making a positive impact lasts longer than money.

2. I am my own CEO and I am the Boss! "I am the biggest Boss that you have seen thus far." -Rick Ross
Sistah-women stop being so modest and stop shying away from being a leader and a boss! Believe in your FLYness! Men don't have a problem saying that they're the Boss or CEO even if they suck at being so! I wake up every day and I say to myself "I am my own boss and I make my own money"! I even made a boom-bap, Hip Hop beat and I rap that over and over to myself because I am the Boss. My Dad and husband even call me the Boss. I am not Bossy, I am the Boss!

Have confidence in yourself. Confidence is a thought and I want you to be confident in everything that you do!

3. Network, build relationships and connect! Everyone has something to offer! Remember, the relationship should be reciprocal! Not take that, take that in the words of Diddy! Take notice of who you want to rock with and who is willing to take from you. Take them out for coffee and have an honest and candid conversation about business, work ethic, and the nature of them reaching out to you. What kind of energy are you giving out and what kind of energy are you receiving from them. If you feel that they are looking to take that, take that; runaway and don't waste time with stagnant and negative energy.

Bonus: All partnerships/strategic relationships should have contracts. It's not right or professional to have one business doing all the work while your business is reaping the benefits. Nah, son! Business relationships should be 50/50 and a win-win relationship. Your word might be your bond, but that doesn't hold up in the court of law.

At the end of the day, myself and Brown Girl From Boston will be alright!!!! I know that I am going to deal with difficulties and temptation to return back to the workplace, but I made a vow to myself and God that I will work it out. I know God got my back and I will be alright. I told my former supervisor this because she indicated that I need my job. LOL! She doesn't know me. By any means necessary, Brown Girl From Boston is going to thrive, serve, and impact people, especially my sistahs. When human beings close the door in your face, don't stand there and do the ugly cry, turn around and enter the door that God opened for you.

Major S/O to Dr. Boyce Watkins and the Black Wealth Boot camp. This five-week course helped me to leave the plantation. My husband and I learned how to invest our money into other businesses. We brought stocks to invest in and making sure that our savings are saving us. Dr. Boyce Watkins stresses the importance of ownership and owning a business. Make sure you check out the boot camp. (theblackwealthbootcamp.com)

As always, thank you for reading Brown Girl From Boston! Thank you for your constant support and love you show the blog!

Love and Light,

Drea