In real life, I had someone who virtually and realistically stalked/trolling social media and blog. I had to block this individual from each outlet of my life because of their negative energy, lack of ownership and accountability, idea stealing and overall energy drainer. In life we are meant to stand out and not blend in. I've decided to share my story because someone might be going through a similar situationship and I want you to protect yourself from users, abusers and manipulators.
These individuals are going to learn today to stop trying to bring people down to their level! I am going to teach you how to identify the user, abuser, or manipulator in your life, know the warning signs and how to release them and their negative energy.
You know you are an amazing individual when someone is trying to duplicate your identity! But enough is enough of the cray cray behavior. Please find and stay in your life.
Who Need to Learn Today?
First you spot them out before they spot you. They have their eyes on you! They are researching everything about you and taking notes on how you handle yourself as a professional and human being. Unfortunately this person don't have what it takes to be you because each of us were created uniquely and can't duplicate greatness!
Watch out for individuals who are pseudo friendly, needy, untrained EGO, have a Christopher Columbus fragmented sense of self and mindset. They have a tendency of abusing power and people by having them do the work all while this individual slide in and take credit for everything. *This person offers unrealistic promises such as flying you in a private jet to the next state over while they are riding the public transportation, please take heed!* Be aware of the fast talkers, charismatic ways and the way they speak to you. These individuals have a way with words that will knock you off your feet if you are not paying attention. Therefore, you must be intuitive, alert, listen between the lines and act on red flags. If you see cray cray coming your way, RUN!!!
*real life scenario*
These individuals are not a team player and play the victim when you set healthy boundaries and confront them on their cray cray/inappropriate behavior. This person isn't humble and will go around trying to slander your name. It's all about them for the time being but guess what? They are either going to learn today or someday!
Protect Yourself and Release Them!
With these individuals you have to release them with the quickness. Block them from all your social media sites, delete/block their number and email address because they will keep coming back if you leave the door cracked open. Just stop giving this person permission to preview your greatness. Just stop! You want to release these people and far away from them immediately because you need to recover and heal the damage that you have allow this person to do. When I say allow, I am not blaming the victim because that is not the situation here. We treat people how we want to be treated. We give permission for people to be in our personal and professional space.
Imagine how many people these individuals abused, used and manipulated over the years of their existence? It is time to put an end to their nonsense by confronting them and releasing them. Here is a secret, lean in... abusers, users and manipulators usually don't last long because they get expose sooner or later. These people are looking for overnight success off the back of hard working, honest and vulnerable people. Don't let individuals like this take your joy nor your job, just laugh and keep progressing. Don't ever get on their level because you will be foolish to do so. Wish them well because you are better not basic.
Be Better Not Bitter!
From time to time, you will run into this person especially if you live in the same city, hang around mutual people or see them at events. Whenever I see individuals like this out and about, I murder them with kindness! I say hello and have them running for the nearest exit. I refuse to be bitter over someone who is unable to be original, a mean girl/boy and an insecure person. Don't ever allow someone to bring you down to their level. You are better than that! Keep your head up, let your light shine and keep striving for greatness! Be better not bitter. Being bitter is bad for your health and you have a long fruitful life to live.
If you are a business owner, my advice to you is to keep things professional and provide contracts. These individuals are frightened by contracts, record keeping and recordings! If they are serious with collaborating with you on projects, they will be more than willing to analyze the contract and sign it.
I hope someone learned from this article and will take heed to users and bullies. You work too hard to allow someone to take all the credit and walk all over you. Don't let this negative experience deter you from your life's passion and purpose. Like the late Maya Angelou said, "When you know better, you do better." It is not worth arguing with the person nor putting them on blast because you two along with the Higher Being know the deal. This experience is a teachable moment and you will be better equip to handle any future situationships.
Remember, whoever is trying to bring you down is already below you. Shine bright, beautiful one! No one cannot take your star power unless you give them permission to do so.
If you are an user, abuser, or manipulator, you are going to learn today to not take advantage of people. If you haven't learned the lesson, you better it get together or someone will get tired of you and get you together.
Thank you for reading and supporting Brown Girl From Boston!
Coaching Question: Have someone tried to take your kindness for weakness? If so, how did you handle the situation?
Love your favorite life coach,
Drea
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