Tuesday, August 18, 2015

Own Your FLYness

"I do not trust people who don't love themselves and yet tell me, I love you. There is an African saying which is: Be careful when a naked person offers you a shirt." -Maya Angelou

Ever since I can remember, my mom, instilling self-esteem, self-love, and self-perseverance into my life. From birth to infancy to a married adult woman, my mom always let me know how intelligent, beautiful, independent, bold, FLY, revolutionary, unapologetic, positive, business savvy, stylish, and a survivalist. These values I hold dear to my heart because being a Brown Girl From Boston and surviving a cold world.

With the help of my mother, I knew that I had to be a FLY (Fearlessly Loving Yourself) in a world that insists that women especially women of color to love everyone before themselves. When you fearlessly love yourself, you are liberating yourself from unrealistic standards, unhealthy patterns, pathology, mindset and breaking the cycle of self-abuse.

Yes, when you don't love yourself that is displaying self-harming, self-abuse and self-sabotaging behavior. When you don't love yourself it is challenging to accept yourself and challenging to accept others wholeheartedly. You CANNOT love and accept others until you love, accept and own your FLYness. When you own your FLYness, you are free, fearless, fierce and accepting.

No one can give you that feeling. Not a romantic partner, a baby, shopping spree nor traveling around the world. When you own your FLYness, be aware and prepared to have people, especially family members and "friends" to persuade you to stop thinking so highly of yourself. People are uncomfortable with growth and change. People want to keep you comfortable because they are comfortable right where you currently are. When you grow, people lose their everlasting mind and here come the hate, discouragement, and negative energy.

Baby Boo, do you and own your FLYness!

Baby Boo, let's get you on the path of owning and finding your FLYness!

Honor Your FLYness: FLYness comes from within! We all are born with FLYness but either we did not see a great example of self-love or we weren't taught that it comes from within or we were misinformed that FLYness comes from our looks, body, and how many wo(men) chase after us. FLYness is using your power, your voice, your goodness to do amazing inner work and radiate love. When you discover your FLYness, honor it, cultivate it and protect it! It's yours. FLYness comes from your soul.

Show up and show out! In my Chris Tucker voice *Don't ever, ever, ever shrink, dismissed nor minimize your FLYness! FLYness is your birthright! If you can't love you, you can't love anyone else! When you walk into the room, SHINE! Your outfit is cute but are you truly showing up and showing out for yourself. Are you radiating your light? Are you radiating love?

Protect and Accept Your FLYness: My favorite quote/mantra is God is within her, s(he) will not fail! You are a Goddess because God is within you. When God is within you, you have no choice but to protect and accept your FLYness. Stop apologizing for taking care and loving yourself! You are supposed to be FLY. FLYness is essential to surviving. When you are FLY, you are protecting yourself from the games, citizenship, abuse, neglect and other negative energy! When you neglect your FLYness, you become preyed on by abusers, users, and emotional vampires who are waiting to attack and prey on your FLYness! Protect your FLYness!

My challenge to you is to find, accept and own your FLYness! Don't ever allow anyone to tell you not to love yourself. Don't ever allow anyone to tell you that you are being selfish because you are loving yourself first! Remember FLYness is essential for survival!

Repeat after me: I deserve to fearlessly love myself before I can love anyone else. FLYness is my birthright!

Thank you for reading and supporting Brown Girl From Boston!

Coaching Tips: How can you cultivate your FLYness?

Light and Love,

The Unapologetic FLY Girl Coach

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