Jan 13th| Another year. 35th. Capricorn. The GOAT. Forever Infinite.

"Thought I wouldn't elevate, I took the stairwell

Watch em stare well, yeah I'm very well

See these pretty wings; I maxed well

I'm Fortunate; I'm the sexiest

Imma tomboy, you love a tomboy" -Sassy by Rapsody

On January 13th, 2018, ya girl, turned 35 years young! I'm thankful to Jehovah! Thanks to the good, the bad, and the ugly because my 34th year was an ongoing saga filled with transitions. 

While the love was pouring in from my family and friends who truly know and love me, I had to reminisce and pay homage to my teenage years that are long gone. I thoroughly enjoyed being a teenager growing up as a Brown Girl From Boston, in Mattapan, to be exact. *S/O to all my 02126ers and my Hollingsworth St. Squad! 

First and foremost, in the 90s, we had Blackplanet! Yes, Blackplanet was our first social media website, and we didn't even know it. My username was BabyPenny33. Yes, I was madly in love with Anfernee Deon "Penny" Hardaway! *Hey, Penny! * No Wifi, but we had AOL Dial-Up to access Blackplanet and Ask Jeeves.  We had pagers/beepers; we actually had the face to face conversations, landline phones, in which your Mom Dukes would embarrass your whole life if she found out you were on the phone after hours.  

I just remembered when life was all so simple. *Cues Wu-Tang Clan, "Can It Be All So Simple"*

A Letter From Teenage Drea: 

Drea, don't trip about people challenging you by asking you: "Who Do You Think You Are?" People are intimidated by your greatness, sassiness, boldness, and unapologetic nature. You are a lone wolf leader, and sometimes that is a lonely road, but it is necessary for your purpose. Stay focused and disciplined. Those qualities will take you far. Yes, you will experience exhaustion, doubt, failure, and delayed gratification, but it will be worth it in the end. Yeah, it sucks that you may have to work ten times harder to get what you want, but you deserve it. Remember, everyone doesn't have the same drive, vision, and goals as you do. So don't give up, and don't expect things instantly. If it was easy, everyone would be doing the same thing. 

It is okay to be a sassy tomboy who understands and loves sports, especially Basketball and Football. Love your Hip Hop music, embrace the way you go from wearing dresses to sneakers to Army Fatigue Camo pants, your hoodies, your bamboo earrings, conscious tees. It is cool to have guy friends and homegirls because you need masculine and feminine energies to get through life. Understand that some people will persuade you to switch your style up because they may not think it is ladylike to be you. They don't understand that you can run a boardroom, be featured on your homeboy's Hip Hop album, and drop knowledge at a conference. It is called balance, and some people want to bottle that Sassy, Tomboyish, Earthy, Blackness, and FLYness magic. Unfortunately, it can't be duplicated because it is part of your essence. You understand that balance is everything! 

Drea, chill! People will love you. Some people are going to dislike you. That's okay. It is essential that you love, like, and value yourself.  Don't you change! You will learn how to adapt, be flexible and align yourself with greatness. Just adjust your crown from time to time. Don't stop believing in what you believe in.  Don't stop speaking your truth. Don't stop being assertive. Don't stop standing up for yourself. Don't stop spreading the love. Do actively listen because we all need and want to be heard. Do walk away when the vibes are off and when love is no longer being served. Do understand that everyone doesn't need a response back. Ensure you speak with conviction and let your word be your bond even if people disagree with you. Make sure you set an intention of being heard, seen, and treated with respect. Ensure you treat yourself with the utmost respect because you teach people how to treat you. 

Do understand some people will disappoint you, especially your nearest and dearest loved ones. Some people are not trustworthy. Some people will not have your best interest at heart. Some people are users and want access to you because of who you are and your resources. Don't allow anyone easy access to your life. Some people don't deserve your magic and light.  Don't forget to listen to your intuition.  Have an open heart, but don't second-guess the nature of people's intentions. Red flags are red flags and hurt people hurt people. 

Drea, you will get your heart broken a few times by intimate relationships and friendships. That's okay because that isn't the end of the world. Make sure you are doing your best in each relationship. Make sure you serve love, graciousness, class, respect, loyalty, and authenticity. Make sure you are doing your part of being the best version of yourself, and some days you will fail at that, and it is excellent. Breakups of any kinda suck, but you will survive. You will move on, mature, and become a better person. Just don't become codependent and move on quickly to a new partner without self-healing.  Don't turn into some psycho ex because that isn't cute, Boo. Let people be who they are. Let your exes go if they genuinely don't appreciate your holistic self. Your exes and ex-friends will realize that you played an essential part in their growth and life journey. Learn how to forgive yourself and forgive others. Forgiveness is the highest form of healing.

Take care of your emotional, mental, physical health! Your health is everything. Health is wealth, and you only get one body. Make sure your inner beauty matches your outer beauty. Healthy Black Don't Crack. Ensure you are very cautious of what you ingest orally, visually, mentally, and verbally. Get healthy, unprocessed, and eat natural foods. Drink plenty of water. Workout. Lift weights. Do yoga. Meditate. Pray. Breathe. Also, remember that coconut oil heals everything, chile. It invests in quality coconut oil, therapy, learning,  shea butter, and essential oils.

Don't box yourself in. Don't allow anyone to box you in. Don't allow anyone to think for you. Ask questions. Be an independent thinker. Don't block your blessings and opportunities. Do block haters, bigots, racists, and all imbalance and unhealthiness from your life. 

You got this,  Queen Drea! One day you will realize how essential and valuable you are. Remember your purpose and life assignment. Protect yourself. Protect your magic. Protect your FLYness. Adjust Your Crown!

Peace, Love, and Light!

Andrea Imafidon | Tough Times Don't Last Forever | #BostonHighlight

Rest Your Spirit But Don't Quit (Video)

It's okay if you are tired. Rest but don't give up! This is the most unhappy times of the year because it is the change of the season, people are fighting illnesses, and people are trying to keep up with the Joneses despite struggling to survive and thrive. Folks are tired and burnt out because it is the end of the year. 

I just want to let you know that I see you. I value you. I love you. You are important and we are going to be alright. If you need any support or resources, please inbox me or email me at drea@browngirlfromboston.com

Why It Takes A Village To Teach A Boy How to Be A Man

"Black men struggle with masculinity so much. The idea that we must always be strong presses us all down - it keeps us from growing." -Donald Glover.

I was privileged to present to a group of Young Black Kings and Young Gods in my hometown (Boston). I have to give a significant big up to my sister-friend, Michelle, for seeing the greatness and Goddess within me and suggesting me as a workshop facilitator to the Boys 2 Men group mentoring program coordinator. I am thankful whenever the youth are involved, and I can insert my knowledge, wisdom, and life experience into them. I remember being a teenager in Boston and having some influential Black community leaders and role models from various professions also pour into me. Each One, Teach One. 

I am thankful that I grew up with all the guys who have guy friends and a husband; I have observed various masculinity, insecurities of being male, hardships, and overall men's issues. I took all that knowledge and studies and presented "What Masculinity Looks Like From A Women's Perspective and Respect Our Boundaries." I had to place myself in the shoes of the young Kings and their inner issues to develop the concept and imagery because young men need to understand how to transition from boyhood to manhood without being effeminized as some women would love to do to men. There is indeed a war going on outside with the Effeminization (to give a (more) feminine, effeminate, or womanly quality or appearance to; "This hairdo feminizes the man) of Black Boys and Men. (Research and do your own due diligence) It takes the right person to bring the balance of feminine and masculine energy together versus getting all my feminine energy, thoughts, and beliefs and placing them on these young gentlemen. We all have both energies that keep life in check and balance. When you have the wrong person (woman) trying to insert and force all their feminine energy onto young men, it never goes well because they are at the age in which they are freely exploring who they are, and they need someone to love and guide them during the self-exploration stage. My mission and vision of the workshop were to identify and define black masculinity, their role in society, how society views them, boundaries within self and relationships, and open-mind and open-heart dialogue. 

My job as the workshop facilitator was to explore masculinity from their and my point of view and merge the two together, along with understanding boundaries and respect within relationships. I appreciate the young men's honesty, rawness, and unadulteration because they expressed themselves unapologetically, asked questions, and listened. As adults, we want to be authoritative to these youths, and we lose them instead of bringing balance, non-judgment, love, kindness, open hearts, and open minds. Remember being a teenager? I remember being a teenager wanting to be heard, validated, and guided. Hence, I played sports, worked, mentored, and went to leadership camps because I thrived on bridging the gap between teenagers and adults. We wanted the same thing for adults, especially those outside the parental unit, because we didn't want our parents to explore or expose our insecurities and self-consciousness to our family, neighbors, or favorite cousins who would never let it go. Whenever I present to teenagers, I come with an open heart and show empathy because I was a teenager at one point in my life. While I had Blackplanet and AOL chat rooms (LOL), I still didn't face as much struggle and challenges as today's youth. Today's youths, especially Brown and Black youths, are being exposed to various things such as cyberbullying, watching and playing violent, over and hyper-sexualized, and traumatizing videos and shows on TV, YouTube, and other social media outlets, to listening to "Shit Hop" AKA Mainstream/Corporatize/Prison to Pipeline Rap music (this is coming from a Hip Hop Head) that is warping and casting a spell of the mindset of the youths and even some adults that are mature or suffer from cognitive dissonance. This is what I am faced with while trying to shape the minds of the youth. 

Back to the topic! I thoroughly enjoyed listening, learning, and analyzing the words, actions, and behaviors of these young men because they taught me a lot about their intelligence level, maturity level, environment, and the overall potential they have if they stay on the course of being part of mentorship with the guidance of two knowledgeable, discipline, and loving Black brothers. I created an imagery board to display the various masculinities from the point of view of popular culture. The opinions and dialogue opened up by reviewing the board and asking about masculinity. The answers were out of this world. I had a few young men tell me that Drake is a bad example of masculinity because of his lyrics promoting being promiscuous, taking other men's women, and having sex with them, etc. We discussed James St. Patrick (Ghost) and Omari Hardwick from Power.

The great conversation around him because he can be hyper-masculinity something that most men strive to be because he gets street cred for being a big-time drug dealer and owning a nightclub while having a side chick along with being married to his wife who is the "ride or die" Most young men didn't feel that image because they felt he wasn't honest, loyal, and loving because of his lifestyle. Lastly, we spoke about President Barack H. Obama, whom the young men admired because he could be the President of the United States without hearing any drama, gossip, or scandals surrounding him. They said they admire his masculinity because he is smooth, married, Black, single-parent, and well-educated. When we discussed the marriage aspect, one young man stated, "Marriage is for White people and not Black people." So, I explored that statement more because I wanted to know where he got that concept from and how it can turn into a teachable moment. The young man stated that he doesn't know anyone married because all he knows is that fathers come and go, leave their mothers, have more children, and never commit to anyone. He also stated that it is normal where he comes from and that the only reason why President Obama is married is that he is half-white. I had to dispel that myth because, as a Black Woman who has been married to a Black Man for almost six years, I have witnessed healthy and unhealthy relationships. Marriage is for mature and understanding people who love one another and strive to be their best version to make the marriage work. When I explained this to the young gentlemen and discussed my own relationship with my husband, I saw the light bulb go off, and their minds shifted because marriage isn't just for White people. 

Overall, I enjoyed presenting to this group because I grew as a woman, wife, spiritual mother, and one day physical mother. I have learned that it takes a village and balance to raise children. We must be more proactive in our youths' lives instead of being judgmental, finger-pointing, blaming, and authoritative. We must teach young men boundaries, respect, and unconditional love. We also need to let these young men know that it is okay to be who they are: intelligent, athletic, inquisitive, kind, strong, well-educated, loving, monogamous, husbands, homeowners, entrepreneurs, and all positive things. We should try to dumb down the youth because they know what they want and have no problem telling you. We need to be the change agents and display appropriate actions. We must teach about consent, boundaries, the consequences of crossing borders, the importance of a family unit, social media dangers, and critical thinking. When I left the young men yesterday, I gave them a lot of homework and research on consent laws, goal setting, boundaries within relationships, positive and conscious Hip Hop, role models, and self-define themselves. We also must teach our boys that they are not niggas. They are Kings, Gentlemen, Classic Men, Gods, and most important essential. We need to encourage them that being intelligent is cool. Being an independent thinker is cool. Being a leader is cool. Being involved in STEM, school clubs, activities, and sports is fantastic. 

If you read this blog post, please consider being a mentor, volunteer, foster parent, role model, and positive figure in a young person's life. They need us, and we need them. 

Want to Become A Mentor? Sign up at Mentoring.Org

Want to Become A Volunteer and Give Back to Your Community? Sign up at Volunteer Match

Love, Light, and FLYness,

Drea

(Video) National Black Women Society: Women of Color Summit Power Lunch Session: I Am My Own Boss and I Make My Own Money

On September 17, Andrea C. Imafidon, CEO/Blogger/Coach of Brown Girl From Boston was invited to share her entrepreneurship journey with Black Women professionals in Boston, MA at Simmons College. The name of her Power Lunch Session entitled: I Am My Own Boss and I Make My Own Money. Check out the video above and and learn some tips on being your own Boss and making your own money, your way.

Recap of #BloggerWeek (Video)

We Are Suppose To Be Gods: David Banner and #TheGodBox Lecture in Boston

                            "It is easy to kill a nigga but hard to kill a God." -David Banner

With the climate of the world, we are running on high emotions, fear, and anger because of police brutality, violence, and low frequency. I had the privilege to go to my hometown this past weekend to check out Mr. David Banner and The God Box lecture. Not only did I check out the lecture but my husband and I had a chance to be part of history at the Strand Theatre. We had a chance to Buy Black through shopping with the beautiful Black Businesses who were vending. You all know how I feel about "The People" having their businesses, making money, building generations, and recycling money within our community. I had a huge smile on my face while entering the building.

I was kind of surprised but not surprised that this event was not sold out because many people are not ready to receive the knowledge, some people had to work, some people just didn't want to come, and some people probably was frightened because of the content and context of Blacks in America and the honest and raw truth. Despite other folks feelings, my husband and I drove from Providence to Boston because we are community leaders, activists, married, and a family unit that will birth and bring folks Black babies into this world. We are seeking and appliers of knowledge and the knowledge we have received about the Blacks in Boston, Blacks in America, and Blacks Globally was definitely on point. I do a lot of researching and studying on historical and present day Black folks and honestly, time haven't changed but history remains and it is getting uglier by the day. Hence, why The God Box lecture is needed and why this event was pertinent especially during this time when Police Brutality is high, social engineering is revered up, and why Black Lives never mattered because we as the people have been conditioned since the Trans-Atlantic Slave trade by the oppressors.

Being a Brown Girl From Boston, Mattapan to be exact; I was taught to know my history and study people and the conditioning of my people from an early age. I have always been taught that history will repeat itself because systems are in place for the programming. I always go back to when one of my favorite teachers and mentor from high school, Ms. Bailey in which she taught my Sociology class. (hence why I am probably a Social Worker, Social Scientist, and Life Coach) She told me to read this book entitled: "The Death of an American Jewish Community: A Tragedy of Good Intentions" by Hillel Levine and in this book it discussed my neighbor of Mattapan being once a predominately Jewish community until the "Great  Migration" which caused "White Flight and the creation of suburbs" which we are now seeing once again in Boston with gentrification and the Whites are redeveloping areas that people of color lived, causing more income inequality, segregation within the City of Boston which is causing Black folks to live out because of the unaffordable to live within the Boston city limits.

Wealth Inequality within the City of Boston. African America families wealth in the City of Boston is $8 compare to White Families in Boston which is $247,500.

Back to the God Box lecture...
Many of these topics were discussed because I felt that I did my due diligence as Tayla Andre and Sabir Bey stated numerous of times during the event. Tayla, Sabir, and the young sister who name escape my memory did a thorough job discussion the history of Blacks in Boston, nationwide, and globally. I appreciate hearing that we should know the laws, study, and not take things at face value. We should also go beyond knowledge itself, we should be out in the communities being on the front line and helping the voiceless and "powerless" dismantle the policies and procedures that are outdated and unjust. We need to build that Black Wall Street that was once was in Tulsa, OK and Durham, NC. We definitely need to participate in group economics, buy Black, mentor our youth, gain wisdom from the elders and involved them in community affairs, build our own schools, hospitals, and other needed community things versus relying on the government to provide these things to us which are normally hand me downs, filled with chemicals, lies, and toxicity anyways.

I have been checking out David Banner's lectures and interviews online because I truly wanted to see the evolution on this brother. I appreciate The God Box lectures because it isn't a "Come to Jesus Meeting" so please leave your religious beliefs, things your Pastor, Deacon, Imam or whoever your religious leaders says. The God Box lectures is not about making you feel good about your religion or having folks be lullaby-ed by rhetoric, lies, and a feel good message. The God Box helps liberate your mind, provoke some though, provoke you to study, and expand your mindset to think beyond a surface level. David Banner spoke truth to power like many other conscious Black speakers, lecturers, and common folks do every day. David Banner just has a bigger platform and the money to back him. I just want to be transparent about that. Most things he says is honest and things I have heard growing up with my family being from the South as well. I appreciate hearing it coming from a reformed (lol) rapper who previously took a page from the Iceberg Slim's books.

My tweet from  Twitter on Being A God!

When David Banner hit that stage, he went all the way in. He told us, to take our photos now and cut our phones off. I appreciate that because we are always plugged in and often miss messages because we are trying to get the video to post for the folks to gloat about being in the presence of David Banner, helping others to tap into the knowledge of self, or for our own personal propaganda. I appreciate being present because I was mindful, received the knowledge, and applied the knowledge. One hard truth that David Banner spoke about was being a Black person in America. He was gutsy by saying that Blacks don't like being Black. Whoa!!!!! I had to sit all the way back in my seat and ponder on this strong, aggressive statement because it was bold, in your face, and his truth. He stated that we have been socially engineered to hate ourselves, our image, our holistic selves because of the things we do to self, calling ourselves "niggas",  the way we assimilate into the dominant society and treat one another. It was a hard, ugly truth because as people of culture, we do a lot of manipulation to self and our culture to assimilative despite being treated less than an animal. Many people treat their animals better than they treat Black people. We also allow this to constantly happen to ourselves as well because we call ourselves "niggas" "hoes" and "bitches" versus "Gods" "Queens" and "Kings". There are an unlimited amount of words in the dictionary but we choose to call and answer to these derogatory words rather than using positive, uplifting and moving words. David Banner went ahead and explain The God Box and proved that we are all Gods and went to the Bible and pulled out about six scriptures in which God who can be "She" "He" or "It" stated that we all are Gods. My favorite scriptures he quoted: Psalms 82:6: "I have said, ‘You are gods, All of you are sons of the Most High."

I am not going to give any more away about the God Box lecture because it is very powerful and I suggest that all my people and Brown Girl Tribe should go and attend the lecture. I don't care what color, creed, nationality, religion, ethnicity, or whatever you claim, just go with an open-mind, and open-heart. The information and delivery that David Banner presents it in are raw, emotionally, but it makes you want to do your due diligence by reading, studying, helping your community and do more for yourself and the people. Also, apply the five solutions he provides:

1. Studying and Learning
2. Practicing Group Economics
3. Education
4. Nation Building through Ownership
5. Accountability and Responsibility of Ourselves and Others

In conclusion, make sure you support people doing real things out there. Support your local folks, support folks who are in your community, support people who are doing positive work. Make sure you pre-order The God Box which is David Banner's upcoming album! Also, I want to give David Banner a special shout out because he took the time to take photos with my husband and I and spoke knowledge to us. Anytime, someone takes the time to speak pure love and knowledge to you, thank them because that creates community, a spark of vision and it shows that humanity hasn't died off yet lol. Speak life to someone just because we all need that spark, love, and knowledge.

Remember, you are not niggas, you are Gods. Don't ever allow that word to enter into your sacred space.

The social inequality of Bostonians 

This sign was hung throughout the City of Boston during the 1800s by the Boston Vigilance Committees informing Black People of communication with police officers and watchmen. 

Thank you for reading the blog post! I truly appreciate you all! Make sure you comment, support, and share the blog post!

Peace, Love, and FLYness,
Drea
Brown Girl From Boston

A "Brown Girl From Boston" Talks to a Brown Girl from Providence: Sonic Watermelons, May 31, 2016

What does it mean to be raised in Boston but living in Providence? What does it look like when launching your dreams looks like recognizing your "inner fly girl"?

Andrea Imafidon took a leap of faith two years ago to leave her full time job and follow her passion for writing. The result is browngirlfromboston.com which focuses on empowering women and showing them how to embrace all that they are.

The last two years have been an explosion of activity between the blog, writing and publishing three books, and providing coaching services for women who are looking to start their own business.

Tonight on Sonic Watermelons we talk about everything that goes into her work and try to find out when she sleeps.

Brown Girl From Boston on Sonic Watermelons

Brown Girl From Boston Celebrating 2 Years of FLYness

"We ain't gotta wait It's a toast to you and me
Bills ain't so bad, celebrate that
Party in the yard 'til the lights come on
Ain't nobody crying
We've come so far, been climbing
Now the clouds they passed us by
C'mon and raise your glass up high"- Common, Celebrate

On May 14, 2016, Brown Girl From Boston officially celebrated two years of being a blogger and business owner. Most startup businesses usually fail or business owners quit their businesses around this time. Many are not supported, they go into business for the wrong reasons and intentions of becoming a billionaire and making a profit from people. Yes, you want to profit from your business because it will be your main livelihood one day. If you are going into business to make money off the rip, you need to review your intention of starting a startup because the money will not fall from the sky in abundance. The clients are not going to kick down your doors waiting to buy your services and business. You will fail over and over because you may not find your formula yet, you don't have someone to mentor you and guide you, and you don't give things a try.

I am thankful that Brown Girl From Boston is still going strong because I wanted to quit Brown Girl From Boston every day. Things got tough, I wanted to quit. I had writer's block, I wanted to quit. I got taken advantage of by some people who wasn't part of my tribe, I wanted to quit. I didn't have any structured order and formula, I wanted to quit. I was alone, vulnerable, and stuck, I wanted to quit. Every time, I wanted to quit, I had my village especially my husband pushing me to keep moving forward. Each time, I thought about quitting, blessings and opportunities came all the way through and I am thankful to God for that.

Let's talk about Celebrating FLYness:

Hunti, I work hard, I play hard, I love, hard, and I coach hard. The grind is too real and I am about the grinding life. I had to slow down on the grind to celebrate a milestone. I was working so hard the first year, I didn't have time to celebrate and embrace Brown Girl From Boston. I love telling my story of Brown Girl From Boston's beginnings. I always make people laugh when I tell folks that I used to work for the Devil Wears Polyester, not Prada. Despite leaving my job as a Director, I did learn a lot about myself and managing folks from various walks of life, personality traits, and character. I need to go through that experience to know how to effective run my business, attract my clients, and press forward when times got rough and tough.

Everyone should celebrate their greatness and FLYness because, in the society we live in, folks are on autopilot. Folks forget to celebrate milestones, accomplishments, and thriving in life. I know there is plenty of work to do but you still don't want to rush through life and forgot to celebrate the small and large victories. Celebrate your life and your life work.

I wanted to celebrate in Providence first because I started BGFB here, I build partnerships and tribe members here, and I just wanted to give back and kick back and enjoy the Brown Girl Tribe. I wanted to celebrated and enjoy one another company and network because we need one another. Also, there isn't a lot of events that celebrate women's FLYness in Rhode Island and other areas. We had women from all walks of life who came out and showed love to BGFB. We have the twenty-something year old to the young and vibrant baby boomers. BGFB definitely bring out best of both worlds and women in between. This celebration was laid back, fun-loving, positive, and open. I stated whatever happens in Brooklyn Coffee Teahouse will stay here. No, I will not share our intimate conversations but know that it was live and plenty of aha moments appeared. Thank you, sistahs, for being so open to share.

I want to share a few blessings that occurred before the celebration to help it become magical:

1. I have to give a major S/O to Diana who is a Brown Girl From Boston, my husband's former high school classmate who was so gracious enough to give and sponsor three deserving women to attend this event.

2. We had a few connections and reconnection during the FLYness celebration. My Mattapan FLY Girls came through and two of them reconnected after not seeing one another since the 6th grade at Thompson Middle School. It was awesome to see the reconnection. We also had two women who connected because they knew the same person. That person was one person's brother and he was the other FLY girls supervisor. Life is crazy.

3. While we were talking about balancing life, business, and intimate relationships; Mr. Imafidon rolled through (LOL). My face was priceless because I wasn't expecting him. Thank goodness I was bad-mouthing him. That is a no-no anyways.

4. We had the perfect amount of women, the perfect energy, and synergy in the room. Each woman was different, similar, came from various walks of life and connected through BGFB. How beautiful! Check out the photo above. No one was domineering, no one was shaming folks, no one bashing folks, and no one brought heat or judgment to the FLY Girl Sistah circle. We all brought our shine and FLYness to support one another.v

5. We were bummed that it had to come to an end. We were vibing, laughing, and enjoying one another's company.

To end this blog post, I have to say this, no copy and paste Brown Girl From Boston because there is only one me. No this isn't an arrogant statement nor a boastful statement. Being Brown Girl From Boston, running Brown Girl From Boston blog and coaching services may look FLY and easy but it is not. I had to find my voice, find my FLYness own my power, and refine Andrea. Brown Girl From Boston isn't going anywhere because we are just getting started. For those who rock with Brown Girl From Boston, I love you, I love how you let your FLYness shine, and I appreciate and see you, FLYness! Thank you for allowing me to be kind, FLY, honest, authentic, funny, Hip Hop Brainiac, brainy, brown, and the FLYest Brown Girl that you know thus far.

Thank you all for the love, support, readership, and well wishes throughout the two years of Brown Girl From Boston! I thought I told you that we won't stop, we are just getting started, Baby!

Peace, Love, and FLYness

Drea

Brown Girl From Boston

It's Brown Girl From Boston 2 Year Blog Anniversary!

Today, my baby, my blog, and my business turns 2! I never thought that leaving my 9-5 as a frustrated, unmotivated, and angry Director of Social Services would blossom into this beautiful life changing blog. I never thought that I would help transform, inspire, and help others to heal, go after their dreams and passions! Blogging took me to a lot of places to spread the raw knowledge of living your life fearlessly and unapologetically without shrinking your great. I had to relearn how to tap into my FLYness, speak my truth, and use my voice.

Cheers to Brown Girl From Boston and the Brown Girl Tribe! Thanks to everyone who love, support, and appreciate Brown Girl From Boston! Thanks for rocking with us for two years! Most businesses and blogs don't last for two years but I'm thankful.

If you are reading this, I am sending you a big hug and kiss! You are appreciated! 

Don't forget to come out to celebrate with us on May 14 at Brooklyn Coffee and Teahouse! You don't want to miss the celebration bash in Providence. (https://www.eventbrite.com/e/brown-girl-from-bostons-celebr…)

We will also be celebrating in Boston over the Summer! Make sure you stay tuned for the Brown Girl Brunch in Boston happening Late July/Early August! I can't wait to see all the FLY Brown Girls in two weeks!

Are You Ready to Manifest Your New Year?

We are 36 days away from 2016!!

You are cordially invited to Brown Girl From Boston,  "Manifest Your New Year" group coaching program starting on December 9th, 2015 . Brown Girl From Boston is going to keep the momentum going from the “Holistic FLYness” tele-class monthly series. We are going to say “No” to setting short term and short lived New Years Resolution and say “Yes” to Manifesting our 2016.

The four-week group coaching program is an interactive course designed to teach you how to manifest your ideal life with confidence, FLYness, and your vision as your guiding force. During the group coaching program you’ll learn practical tools for manifesting your vision into your reality.

For only $75, you will learn:

• How to create a manifesting mindset through expressive art such as 
• How to create daily affirmations and mantras to manifest your New Year
• How to increase self-worth and confidence How to release Fear, negative self-talk, negative people, and self sabotaging behavior
• How to life the FLY Life (Fearlessly Loving Yourself) while being unapologetic about it. 
• How to forgive yourself and forgive others in order to move forward with an unstoppable and unapologetic New Year!

Here’s what you Get:

4 live 60-minute classes 

Each week there will be a 60-minute interactive call with me. All calls will be held on Wednesdays at 7pm EDT. You will receive all recordings via email to ensure your learning and progress continues.

4 Weekly modules with growth work & activities :

Each week you will receive specific manifestation homework & activities to ensure that you are making progress toward your vision.

Access to Private Facebook Manifest Your New Year Group: 

During the course, you will have access to the Facebook Manifest Your New Year private group where you can ask me questions directly and connect with the other Manifest Your New Year tribe participating in the group coaching. 

Register by Wednesday, November 30th and pay only $75. After November 30th, the investment is $95. Sign up for Manifest Your New Year

Since you all are part of the Brown Girl Tribe: You will receive $10 off of your group coaching program! Please enter coupon code Boston

Look forward to helping you manifest your 2016!

Love and Light,
Drea

Jazzy January (An Ode to My Grandma Tessie Mae Stallworth)

Dear Jazzy January you have been a blessing to me
From January 1st to the 13th you created her story.
Born through a Boston blizzard, an infamous day the Stallworths' will always remember.

Auld Lang Syne, tic toc, acquaintances  are often forgot its their time to get dropped.
You stand out first, some people use curse words because you work their nerves.
Jazzy January stands strong, bold, and focused.

New Years Day birth Tessie Mae
Born in Owassa, Alabama,
Panorama, cozy and quaint community
God blessed the soul of the simple but complex beauty.

Quiet woman, hard worker didn’t go unnoticed.
Soul of a Goddess, mysterious eyes so exotic
Red undertones, European style nose blessed with a mystique, high cheek bones.
Creek Indian blood flow, kissed by the winter sun, blissful pleasant glow.

From Jim Crow to missing free throws
I carry on Tessie’s legacy
Jazzy Jan thanks for blessing me.

Ten Things I've Learned at The Massachusetts Conference for Women

On December 4, 2014, I attended The Massachusetts Conference for Women in my hometown of Boston, MA. This was my second year in attendance and the excitement was definitely in the air. This year, I served as a volunteer for over 10,000 women! The Massachusetts Conference for Women is the largest conference for women within the United States and it was sold out within a matter of days when the registration was open. The estrogen and feminine energy was off the charts. Every woman, I encounter or provide instructors to were kind, energetic and ready to invest in their person and professional development.

I've met so many successful, dope and unapologetic women who was in attendance by any means necessary (sick leave, extra time, volunteer, sponsorship and etc.) Last year while I was in attendance, I was in a fragile, lost and broken state. I was hyper-emotional, broken and overcoming workplace abuse from my former supervisor. I was blessed with having my ticket sponsored by CWE Providence and Cisco to attend the Conference. This year I was able to bless myself and someone else by volunteering my time, patience and beautiful energy. During my time while volunteering, I've met women in which we possessed a lot of commonality such as serving others, being successful in our own right, finding passion by quitting an unfulfilling job and tapping into our happiness and greatness.

You never know who is going through a similar situation until you say hello or work with them on completing an assignment. I've met a beautiful soul who is on the journey of finding her passion through becoming a coach to people who are looking to embrace and hug their fear and break free of boundaries. When I heard this, I had to learn more about herself because I found serenity through her holistic beauty and gentleness. She informed me that she recently quit her job to blog and become a coach, at this point, I hugged her and told her that I am proud of her because I was in her shoes last year. You just never know who have a similar journey like yourself and it is best to speak to people and listen to their journey. I have learned a lot from her and we exchange contact information to keep up one another.

After my volunteer shift was completed, I was able to eat lunch with fellow volunteers, share stories and embrace as sisters! During lunch, we were blessed to hear from the beautiful and incomparable Lupita Nyong'o who informed everyone that our dreams belong to us and that we will encounter fear along the way but you must recognize it and articulate your fears. Lupita stated that "Our dreams derived from our imagination. We own them. We cannot let them defeat us. This was such a powerful message because many times, we encounter people within our lives who are dream and passion killers. Many people kill dreams and passion because they were too afraid of pursuing their own dreams and passions and usually hurt them to see someone else pursue something they were unable to do. To people who many be dream and passions killers it is not too late for you.

After hearing Lupita's keynote, we got to hear the courageous and driven Hillary Rodham Clinton! She came out swinging by openly and fearlessly discussing the unjust and unequal judicial system against African Americans within the United States. Back to back no indictment of the slaying of Mike Brown and Eric Garner is the hot, emotional and upsetting topic of discussion. To hear Hillary discuss this topic as a Caucasian woman was revering because at the end of the day we are all interconnected and it effects all of us indirectly or directly if you want to believe it or not. Hillary also went on to discuss the inequality of pay for women within the workforce and the guilt women feel when they decide to have children and is unable to fully be present in that child's life due to work obligations especially single mothers. Hillary also discuss the unfairness and lack of funding of women entrepreneurship. Women are slighted when it come to starting a business because we go into business with lack of resources, funding and support from SBA and other federal agencies. As an entrepreneur it is difficult to take your business to the next level due to lack of funding and support from your counterpart and community. To hear Hillary's keynote speech was refreshing and exhilarating for me to hear because I was questioning my ability and my funding resources but I realize that I cannot quit my divine assignment because this is what I was called to do.

Now here is the nitty gritty of the ten things I've learned at The Massachusetts Conference of Women. Are you ready? Let's get it!

1. No one ever ask men about work-life balance! Women are always in the spotlight when it come to balancing work and their personal life. We often feel guilty and feel that we cannot have it all because we haven't figured out how to balance out work-life. I don't believe this is a concrete answer because I feel that our work-life balance look different for all of us. I rather find the rhythm and dance along with the rhythm. If I have to slow whine to a soca, reggae , or calypso tune for the day than slow whine it is. Dance to you own rhythm and tune for the day.
2. I'm an unapologetic married woman who is childless! I have been married for over three and a half years and people ask my husband and me about having children. I had to firmly and lovingly put people within their place about such a private matter. No one should dictate your womb but you. I am not less of a woman because I don't have a child. Children and pregnancies is a private and intimate matter that should be discuss between two mature people. So, please mind your business and stop asking about my and other women's womb!
3. As women we don't embrace and celebrate our greatness enough! I beat myself over the negativity and past mistakes. I don't embrace nor celebrate my greatness enough. I also noticed that many women don't celebrate their wins and zone in on our inadequacies. No ma'am, I made a pact with myself to embrace and celebrate my greatness from now until forever! No time for beating myself because we already living in a cold, cold world in which we are rejected and beat up daily. 
4. You can be kind and assertive! One of my assignments at the conference was controlling a room filled with over 500 women. Now, things can become chaotic quickly with that many estrogen in one space. I had to use my assertiveness training by giving specific instructions to women before and after the breakout sessions. You can get a lot of things done by being assertive, kind and open. If you are rude, argumentative and aggressive and wonder why you are being disrespected all the time? It is time to change your attitude and approach. Remember attitudes can make or break a situation.
5. Network without boundaries! Many people whether you are an introvert, extrovert or ambivert must develop their own networking style. In order to move forward in life, receive opportunities and blessings, you must take the chance to network. Networking isn't just giving your business cards to anyone, networking is about building lasting working relationships. I have networked with various women from all walks of life and learned many things from. Networking is about listening, being present and finding commonality. 
6. Happiness is an active practice! I was able to attend an afternoon breakout session hosted by Kathy Kinney (Mimi on The Drew Carey Show) and Cindy Ratzlaff (marketing guru of the South Beach Diet). These two have been best friends for over 30 years and helped one another through the ups and downs of life. (That is true friendship). This workshop was funny and needed because I am reclaiming my happiness through the thick and thin of life. These two entertaining and energetic women discuss how happiness is a free gift we can give ourselves. As women we usually say yes to others and no to ourselves hence why so many women are burnt out and bitter towards people. We need to reclaim our happiness, ladies!
7. We need to surround ourselves with agenda free family members and friends! When I heard this amazing advice, I wanted to jump up and down and say AMEN! Recently, I had to release people including family members and friends with agendas free. I was tired of having my blood boiling whenever I see their name on my phone, or see a message from them in my inbox. I had to release these people with love because I was hurting myself by becoming upset and saying yes to them and not receiving the same treatment. I had to protect myself from bitterness and anger. The people who are agenda free in my life appreciate true, honest, productive, businesswoman, funny, witty and gentle Drea. I know I can call them and they are willing to deal with my cray cray self. Find an agenda free people who will embrace and celebrate the true essence of you without any hidden agenda. 
8. Volunteering humbles you! I love volunteering whenever I have free time away from my personal and professional life. I love serving people because it recharges my inner essence. When you volunteer you pay it forward to others. While volunteering for the Massachusetts Conference for Women, I've met some amazing women, put in major work with placing name cards on thousands of tables in the ballroom, and providing safety and instructions for over 500 women during the morning breakout session. Mama was tired of seeing the beautification of the ballroom, the smiles on the attendees faces and the flow of the conference was worth it. 
9. My mom is such a progressive woman/mother! During the conference, I kept thinking about my mother and how she would love to attend a wondering conference. My mom is my shero because she always supported my dreams, passions and goals. She never once killed my dreams nor passions but only fueled them with her love and support. My mother always tell me how amazing I am and how proud she is of me and that's why I refuse to quit on pursuing my passion. Despite my mom being from the "old school" she understands and embrace the importance of women having and holding their own. That's why my mom is my shero! 
10. It's okay to face and acknowledge your fears! At the ripe age of 31, I am learning how to acknowledge and face my fears. I am a recovering overachiever and perfectionist and God knows that I despise fear and my weaknesses. When Lupita stated that we should face and acknowledge our fears thats when the floodgate open for me. I said to myself I deal and slay fear everyday. I refuse to allow fear to paralyze me from achieving my greatness. That's why I write my goals and dreams down to conquer fear and keep me in check of my life journey. 

I hope you all learned something from my journey of being a volunteer for The Massachusetts Conference for Women! If you reside within the New England area, please try to attend this amazing conference at least once in your lifetime. It is worth it and you will be transformed. For more information about The Massachusetts Conference for Women please check out: http://maconferenceforwomen.org/. If you have any questions about the conference, please feel free to ask me.

Coaching Question: How do you invest in your personal and professional development? Do you attend conferences, workshops or webniars? We want to hear from you.

Love Your Sister-Friend,

Drea

PS. My writer's block have ended! I burnt myself out by writing two ebooks and writing for other blogs, websites and magazines. But, I'm focus (wo)man!!! LOL!

For Brown Girls Who Are Considering Coaching: But Don't Know Much About Coaching

"Do the best you can until you know better. Then when you know better, you do better."-Maya Angelou Coaching is an interactive and powerful way to call you to your highest purpose and helping you to break through to your life's passion and purpose. Coaching is a safe place in which you can remove yourself from the daily distractions, remove your mask in a safe and loving environment. Coaching also provides people with regaining your voice, hope, and power to a better YOU! Coaching is what you make it, fun, tough and empowering. You will be in your feelings, you will be held accountable and possibly do the ugly cry, but you are on the road of healing. I discovered that coaching is the new phenomenon, especially in the community where ethnic diverse lives. Coaching been around for at least 25 years. Within the last decade, coaching exploded as the new and improved field. Whenever I write, discuss and blog about coaching, I have a lot of people give me the side-eye or seem to hesitate to ask in-depth questions about coaching. Many are fearful due to lack of knowledge of coaching, unclear of what they want to work on, uncommitted to the coaching program, and the list continues. Are my brown girls and beaus fully understand coaching? And the amazing transformation process that takes place? Culturally and historically, women of color, especially African-American women dismissed anything therapeutic/clinical such as seeking a therapist, counselor or social worker because they didn't want labels place on them such as "Cray Cray" or weak. Usually, women of ethnic diversity, especially African-American women suffer in silence or try to pray it off. Also, as an African-American woman, we have been programmed and browbeat into not "telling our business to outside folk." My questions to those who are suffering in silence and distrustful of others: How is that working for you? It is time to break the generational curse of being strong, independent and able to hold it together. Honestly, we as women of color are not able to hold it together because many of us are suffering, struggling and stressed. Stop going through life on autopilot. As a Social Worker and Life Coach, I understand the true value of seeking a coach. I also understand that it takes courage and vulnerability to admit to yourself that you are "sick and tired of being sick and tired" and you are ready for a change. Not only do I coach women of ethnic diversity to live out loud, boldly, fearlessly and unapologetically; I coach women who are looking to start/restart their business. I coach women to start their business from start to launch and it is such an amazing thing. Coaching vs. Counseling It is important to me that you have clarity about the difference between coaching and other types of professional services such as therapy or counseling, consulting and mentoring. Coaching focuses on where you are presently and where you and where you are going, with a goal of helping you gain clarity about your vision, eliminate obstacles to your success, accelerate the pace of personal and professional growth and do results that allow you to live your best life-professionally and personally. We can focus on any area of your life: Relationships, Finances, Spiritual Life, Work, and Business, or Physical Health and Environments. While coaching is a forward-focused, counseling tends to deal more with past issues in which you may find yourself stuck and struggling. We may occasionally discuss something that has occurred in the past, for clarifying the present, but your coaching will not focus on resolving the past. Do you need coaching or counseling? If your past is an issue, counseling is your best option. If your past is simply a fact (regardless of whether the circumstance were difficult or negative), you are probably ready for coaching. If it seems that there is an issue for which you may need counseling, I will suggest it. With the support of a counselor or therapist, some people choose to engage in coaching and counseling simultaneously, but with a focus on different areas of life for each service. I also believe that women of color don't see other women of color offering their coaching services, nor feel that coaching is a necessity. Coaching is not only a necessity, but it's affordable. As a coach, I deal with the here and now issues such as achieving your goals and dreams. Coaching deal with celebrating the victories and improving the room for improvement. (Hence, I didn't say weakness because I don't like that term.) Coaching deal with celebrating your true essence and having someone to cheer you on to complete that unwritten book, relocating to another city, state, or out the country and just discovering your true greatness. Coaching is all about investing in yourself. Embracing your essence and being F.L.Y (First Loving Yourself)! Coaching isn't court mandated (thank goodness), we don't stay stuck with discussing the past issues which are keeping you from shining. If you find yourself stuck in your past issues or trauma, I would more than likely refer you to a therapist, who is educated and equipped with the clinical tools. Most importantly, coaching is a beautiful, growing experience. Brown Girls you are amazing and great! Do we have challenges and difficulties? Yes, we do. Can we be great? Yes, we can! Coaching Questions: What is holding you back from living your life loudly, boldly, fearlessly, and unapologetically? Do you know the value of life coaching? What is holding you back from pursuing coaching? We will love to hear from you! Comment in the comment section below. Sign-up for your 30-minute complimentary coaching discovery call! Thank you for reading Brown Girl From Boston! XOXO, Drea