I have never celebrated a holiday due to my personal beliefs about the holidays being a Pagan custom. I never observed a holiday because I grew up in an unorthodox but truth-telling household in which my mother was a devout Jehovah's Witness and my Father was a passive Baptist who proudly represented his Masonic organization. I will dedicate a future blog to growing in an unorthodox household, which is why I don't follow trends. Back to the topic at hand... During the holiday seasons, we spent much of our time traveling to my parents' hometown of Atmore, AL, or at Disneyworld and visiting family simultaneously in West Palm Beach, FL. As a 31-year-old married woman, my husband and I travel, visiting either my family in Alabama or his family in Massachusetts.
I love that my husband doesn't celebrate holidays because it is less stressful for us; we know that our love goes beyond exchanging gifts only once or possibly twice a year, and we look at the bigger picture... Obtaining true happiness beyond material things. I decided to write this blog article because the holiday season is the unhappiest time of the year in my eyes, and guess what... Jesus is not the reason for the season, my dear people. You can throw shade, side-eye this article, or call me a holiday hater, but this is my truth, and I will shed light.
1. Many people suffer and struggle during this time of the year. Did you watch the news recently? What have you noticed? People are dying in vain due to their internal struggle and suffering. People are committing suicide, murder-suicide, homicide, robbery, and other heinous crimes all because people are suffering and struggling, tired of being lonely/alone, living in isolation, and suffering in silence. I don't like this time of the year because people are just surviving on life support, and it makes me upset because these same people are the invisible population who you may work with, live with, or even know. Please don't ignore these people's suffering; if you are suffering internally, please don't suffer in silence. People who are suffering from mental health illnesses usually suffer even more due to being isolated from family and friends. If you need someone to talk to, please contact The National Suicide Hotline: 1-800-273- 8255
2. Many people go into debt! Let me ask you this, why would you stop paying your rent/mortgage, utility bill, or any pertinent bill just to buy gifts for one damn day? This frustrates me because this is supposed to be the happiest time of the year. Each year, people lose their everlasting minds on "Black Friday," "Cyber Monday," and the entire month of December to impress or make an ungrateful family happy by buying their love. When did you last buy from a small business invested in your friend's company? Buying honey and going into debt for someone ungrateful and unappreciated isn't worth it. I suggest skipping out on the gifts, paying your bills on time, and being thankful for your life and the people who appreciate you for you. Plus, you have 364 other days to show your appreciation for someone. Many people appreciate time versus money. Money can't buy you time or happiness. But you don't hear me, though!
3. Increase and intense people-pleasing. This ties in with #2! You spend the majority of your year gossiping, complaining, and avoiding that friend or family who works your everlasting nerve. All of a sudden, they are your ace boon coon because it is the holiday season, and you want to get on their good side to hopefully get a gift. Please, stop. Please stop being fake, passive-aggressive, and dismissive of your feelings for this person. Being a people pleaser hurts you because you constantly say yes to others while saying no to yourself. How about you start placing healthy boundaries, start forgiving, and start releasing harmful and toxic people and thoughts. Remember, fronting and faking it is terrible for your health.
4. Mass text messages/communication. When did you last pick up the phone to speak with your family members or long-lost friends? If you miss them, don't wait until the holidays to acknowledge a family member or friend and then get upset when they ask, ""Who
5. Stop with the facade. People can see behind your fake smile, fake community service, fake laugh, and fake happy holidays. I see it, and many other people see it. You last volunteered, checked on your older neighbor, or given to charity all year. Why now? What are you going to contribute to the remainder of the year or next year when people are in need than before? How long will it take you to return to your old self? You know who you are? People are in need every day and need your agenda-free smile, positivity, and time. Don't stop giving your time, effort, and money after the holidays.
Thank you for reading this blog article. We live in an unhappy society in which people are struggling and suffering in silence. Many people celebrate something they don't even know why they are honoring or are too afraid to question why they are participating in something. Life is challenging and complex for some, but the holiday season intensifies the feelings and emotions. Please be gentle with yourself and others during this sensitive time of the year.
Coaching question: Why do you celebrate the holidays? Why celebrate the holidays when it brings on stress and unnecessary debt?
Love your sister-friend,
Drea
