Guest Blog Post: Unraveling the Tangled Web of Stress: A Guide to Identification and Management by Kevin D. Ogle

 

You're not alone in feeling the weight of stress on your shoulders. In today's fast-paced world, stress has become a constant companion for many. Recognizing the sources of your stress is the first step toward managing it effectively.

This journey requires introspection and a commitment to change. As you embark on this path, remember that small, consistent efforts can significantly transform how you experience and handle stress. Brown Girl From Boston shares more:

Pinpointing the Root Causes

The journey to stress management begins with a deep dive into the causes that trigger your stress. It could be the mountain of work awaiting you every morning, the intricate dynamics of your personal relationships, the anxiety of financial constraints, or concerns about your health. Acknowledging these stressors is not a sign of weakness but a brave first step toward gaining control over them.

Financial Health: More Than Just Numbers

Financial stress can be overwhelming, but taking proactive steps to manage it can bring immense relief. Start by focusing on improving your credit score. A good credit score above 740 is essential for favorable loan terms and reflects your financial stability. Essentially, it represents to lenders how likely you are to repay your loans. Managing your finances well is a crucial step towards peace of mind.

Breathing and Mindfulness: The Twin Pillars of Serenity

Integrating deep breathing and meditation into your daily life can be a game-changer. These practices are not just for those with hours to spare; even a few minutes daily can profoundly impact your stress levels. The calmness you'll experience is not just a temporary reprieve but a building block for long-term peace.

A New Chapter: Career Change for Mental Wellness

Sometimes, the stress of a stagnant or overly demanding job calls for a bold move. Consider a career shift as a pathway to mental rejuvenation. The realm of online education has made it easier than ever to acquire new skills without sacrificing your current commitments.

Imagine exploring the complexities of the human mind through a degree in psychology. Learning about cognitive and affective processes can equip you to aid others while enriching your mental health.

The Elixir of Physical Activity

Never underestimate the power of a good workout. Exercise isn't just about physical fitness; it's a potent antidote to stress. The endorphins released during physical activity are nature's stress-busters. Find a form of exercise that sparks joy in you and make it a staple of your routine.

Cultivating a Garden of Positivity

Your mindset is pivotal in how you perceive and react to stress. By focusing on gratitude and mindfulness, you shift from a problem-centric view to a solution-oriented perspective. This positive approach doesn't just alleviate stress; it transforms your entire outlook on life.

Nourishment for the Body and Mind

What you eat significantly impacts how you feel. A diet high in processed foods and sugars can exacerbate stress, while a nutrient-rich diet can enhance overall well-being. Embrace whole foods and experience a healthier body and a more balanced state of mind.

Finding Harmony Between Work and Life

The balance between your professional and personal life is crucial for long-term stress management. Dedicating time to self-care and leisure activities is not a luxury but a necessity for maintaining mental health. This balance is the key to sustained productivity and happiness.

Final Thoughts

Your journey through the maze of stress is unique, but the steps to manage it are universally effective. From understanding the root causes to implementing practical strategies for relief, every step you take is a move toward a more peaceful, fulfilling life.

Managing stress is not a destination but a continuous journey of self-care and mindfulness. Embrace these practices, and watch your life transform into a calmer, more balanced existence.

Blog Post Author

Kevin D. Ogle

Anxious.biz 

Being A Strong Black Woman Is Not My Calling

I woke up and decided being a Strong Black Woman was not my calling. Being a Strong Black Woman is not my ministry. I cannot and will no longer kill myself for the sake of keeping my career, keeping the peace, or settling for nonsense. I would rather avoid situations and environments where I must stay strong. 

I woke up and received a download from the Most High to write a quick blog post about being A Strong Black Woman and how I have suffered in silence while taking on unnecessary stress, nonsense, and toxic treatment from myself and others. I am unashamed to state that I brought into the narrative of being a Strong Black Woman and how to be unbothered and stoicism about things that do bother me, hinder me, and keep me stuck in this unhealed, traumatic, and perpetuated lie we have inherited from our ancestors, our Mothers, and other Black Women and often time society. Before getting into my story about being strong, I have to say this: being a Strong Black Woman is detrimental to our mental health, physical health, and spiritual health. 

It affects our mental health: It affects Black Women's mental health because we suffer in silence and internalize toxic messaging, wear a mask, can't be sensitive, and constantly suppress who we are. We have to put our needs on the back burner and become a martyr to be strong and stoic. 

It affects Black Women's physical health because when we internalize the messaging of being strong and not letting your hair down, we are stoicism and unbothered while we are suffering from high blood pressure, rising levels of cortisol, emotional eating, insomnia, underlying health issues such as an autoimmune disorder, fibroids, and more. Many Black Women are taught to be caregivers, prove their worth, and neglect themselves for the sake of pushing through and being strong because you cannot allow others to see you sweat while your mental and physical health is declining. 

It affects our spiritual health; faith and prayer are sometimes all we have. Still, even that is affected because you question the Most High on your internalized struggle: why are you dealing with difficult situations, people, and toxic environments. You become hopeless and helpless because you feel the highest abandon you, and your faith wavers. 

I have decided to break up with being strong because I am exhausted. I am tired of fronting and adopting the ideology of others because that doesn't work for me. One of my managers told me I needed to be strong and toughen up because the "students" would take advantage of me. I needed to rule with an iron fist. No, ma'am, that's not me. Plus, you get more with honey than you do with it. I will not subscribe to being a Strong Black Woman to appease other aggressive, harmful, and toxic Black Women. I refuse to prove my toughness because I come from a long line of Strong Black Women, but on the low, they were resilient; no doubt, they also died at young ages due to stoicism, aggressive stress, toxic environments, and caring for the needs of others while neglecting themselves. I am trading in strong for being soft, sensitive, and sensible. Sometimes, due to the environments and people I was surrounded by, I had to adapt to the Timberland Boot energy, aka being strong, independent, and fiery, but that was exhausting. When I am in survival mode or want to be heard and seen, I revert back to that energy. Still, it doesn't serve me and takes a significant hit on my mental health, physical health, and spiritual health because I was masking my true self instead of walking and living my truth. I have been told that you will have to deal with something and stop crying because people will take advantage of your "weakness" instead of, wow, you are empathetic. Let's cultivate that skill, which is a strength. 

Journal Prompt: Flyness, what are you done with? What are you going to replace that with?
 

Get Well, Flyness: Saturday Self-Care Edition

We have to stop being our biggest critics while navigating critical and disempowered people on a daily basis. There's a difference between criticism and feedback. Negativity begets negativity

I want you to practice speaking, thinking, and treating yourself with care and love.

Take pride in your appearance, hygiene, and overall grooming. Sit down today and write down the last time you went to the doctor, dentist, or specialist. Don't like your body, write down what you are going to work on feeling good, looking good, and being good by working on your mind, body, and spirit.

If you want to make a change, you have to change your attitude and perspective on life and do the inner work. No shortcuts or tapping out during difficult times. It builds your character and resilience.

Small steps will help you to conquer the major steps. While you're conquering baby steps, I want you to unlearn and dismantle that inner critic within yourself. It's not going to be an overnight process, it might be a lifelong journey but it's worth it.

Think highly about yourself. Treat yourself with the utmost respect and be the blueprint of how others treat you and yourself. Speak to yourself in the most empowering and uplifting manner

 

Live From Tuskegee with BrownGirl from Boston

#WellnessWednesday: Purpose, Passion, Patience, and Persistence

Inner Peace Is The New Success!

Like the video and written content, please donate: https://www.paypal.me/andreaimafidon

Stress Kills!!! Keep Your Stress In Check Before It Check You!

Stress is actually the underlying issue for most health issues such as strokes and heart attacks. Stress kills. Stress weakens the immune and cardiovascular systems. Stress offsets mental health issues that manifest into physical health issues. We have to start identifying the stressful people, events, and things and start removing them from our life. Stop living a luxurious and unstable life trying to keep up with other working-class poor people. 

Let’s keep it 💯 if you aren’t connected to wealth, struggling to pay bills despite having a decent income, and you are one check or incident away from homelessness...you are working-class poor. If you are Black living in America with limited resources, no reparations, dealing with wealth, health, and sociopolitical inequality, NOW is the time to start reassessing success, aspirations, pooling our resources together, living intergenerational, and living a simple and stable but full life. 

Don't forget to download: What We Get Wrong About Closing the Racial Wealth Gap.

Lunch and Learn with Brown Girl: Follow up on Mental Health and Physical Health!

#Unbothered

"You have to learn how to care about people without taking on all their problems."-Phylicia Rashad

On a daily basis, I am free, unbothered and an unapologetic FLY Brown Girl! But this week, I've been practicing being unbothered, unapologetic and Nae Nae-ing (made this one up) myself away from bullish. Baby, it has been an uphill battle because I am dealing with some bothersome folks and situations.

I drive my entire family Cray, Cray because I remain unbothered, calm and intact when bullish happen that is uncontrollable. To them, they feel as if I don't give zero "Fs" but in my mind is true. I continue to emphasize to my family, especially to my mother and husband, that I have to keep my stress low because I am battling my autoimmune disease. I refuse to use my illness as a crutch and keep being unbothered. I don't have time for going 0 for 100 with them because I have a lot at stake. The stakes are high when it comes to a Cray, crazy situation.

Anyways, we finally made it through my oldest brother's wedding and everything went Cray, Cray, but it was a beautiful, chaotic day. From unsure thoughts of marriage, my original bridesmaid dress not fitting, being a wedding coordinator, my brother's last minute wedding meltdown, my mother's "Ah Lawd" meltdown and I was outdone by everyone and everything.

I have been breathing, praying, meditating and getting away from it all. I had to be the daughter, life coach, therapist, supportive and assertive little sister, daughter, and voice of reason. I came to the conclusion that I am done and it wasn't worth getting myself worked up. I am coping by strongly standing in my truth, saying 'No' firmly and being unbothered in a somewhat bothersome situation. Am I pissing off a lot of people by being unbothered? You damn right, my folks are pissed but I am dealing with compassion burnout, an autoimmune disease with further unknown illnesses, and self-image and body shaming issues from a family member who shall remain nameless until the next blog post due to the fluctuation of weight, mood swings, and other BS.

Despite dealing with all this, I am unapologetically FLY and loving myself through these bothersome issues and situations that I am dealing with. It is hella challenging, but Jehovah is helping me develop more thickness of the skin, love for myself and being self-acceptance of self. I am all that I have and I must love myself through every challenge.

Chile, please stop allowing bother some people and situation kill your energy and vibe. Here are five ways to be unbothered in a somewhat bothersome situation:

1. Know who you are and knows what make you tick! Many times we take on a lot of peoples is forward to be "Captain Save the World" and  "S (hero). Say no to saving folks, especially able-bodied folks who are capable of saving themselves. You are not Jehovah, Jesus, Allah or whoever else. As Project Pat said, don't save them, they don't want to be saved.

2. Stop holding your breath! Whenever we are stressed, burnout or just over it, we usually hold our breath. Holding your breath, stop the flow and forces us to hold on to our problems inward, which cause stress, illness, and other issues. When we breathe in we are regrouping, refreshing and resetting our energy. When we breathe out we are releasing toxins, negativity, aggravation, thoughts and clear our minds.

3. Stand on Your Truth! Many of us go along with the program, straddle the fence and conform to please others while we are unsatisfied. If you don't like something, someone or a situation speaks your truth in a loving but firm manner. I added loving because you must murder people with love because they expect bitterness from people who are speaking and standing for truth. People pleasers never win nor happy because they lose their voice and power by giving to people who don't deserve it.

4. Remove yourself from the bothersome situation! I have learned how to physically, mentally and emotionally remove myself from bothersome people and situations. These situations and people are harmful, detrimental and useless.  We use great energy trying to figure out bothersome and chaotic people and situations. Please, stop it. These situations and people have an understanding and relationship with one another that is confusing, dysfunctional and abusive. Run far away from it.

5. Find your solace to keep your inner peace! Many people who are bothersome haven't found peace within, and like to disrupt others who are peaceful. You have to protect your solace by any means necessary. Find your sacred and safe place where you can let your hair down, be comfortable in your skin, and cleanse your mind, body, and spirit. Dealing with a bothersome situation and people will drain your entire energy, disrupt your peace and take away your joy!

Remember, when you encounter a bothersome person and situations, RUN! It is none of your business, stop trying to slap back at everything and everyone that is bothersome because they are pros at being bothersome and protect your FLYness. You are too FLY to be bothered.

Thank you for reading and supporting Brown Girl From Boston!

Love and Light,

Drea